We got the news this morning that my father-in-law passed away. Bari called me at work and I immediately came home. As anyone who just lost a parent, he is in shock. Bari M. (Gippy), had been ill for several years. I don't know I can name all the health challenges. Arthritis took it's tole, as did some kind of cancer of the tonsils. Like I said, I never knew all the specifics of his ailing health. What I do know, is that Gippy had the flu (or flu-like symptoms) this past week, and this morning he died.
I don't think it is possible to stand by your spouse without reliving your own experiences. This morning as I comforted and supported my dear husband, I remembered every moment of the evening my own father passed away. Nothing can prepare you for the inevitable. Even though I have a strong sense of purpose of my mission in life, my belief in Christ and Eternal Family, it is nonetheless, difficult to move forward in this life without a parent. Parents are the strength of the family, the ties of family bonds. Thinking of one parent without their spouse beside them, is terrible. It isn't just your own mourning/sadness/sense of loss, it is the concern of your surviving parents mourning/sadness/sense of loss that can become even more overwhelming.
I can't say enough great things about Bari's parents (all 4 of them!). All have been nothing but gratious, kind and inclusive for my children and myself in their family.
One of the first Christmas' I had with my kids and Gippy & Nana, they were teasing Bari about keeping us - whether or not he married me. They were instantly in love with all the kids and included them in every family activity. The only sadness I ever saw in Gippy was when he would reflect on not spending enough family time together.
The last time I saw Gippy and Nana, was when they came up (they live in Chattanooga), for Bari Ray's Graduation, and was here for the twin's birth also. (It was all on the same night- my family, over-scheduled, as usual). Bari M. and Linda were planning on coming up at New Year's to have Christmas with all the grandkids, and see the twins.